They Call Me Phat Dragon
AKA The Incredible Kung Fu Master
Review
Format: Dubbed VHS
Stars: Tung Wei, Sammo Hung, Meng Hoi, Chung Fa, many many others

Kung Fu Ching (someone I don't recognize, I'll figure it out later -This guy is Tung Wei-) is interested in two major kung fu schools and learns from both, only to realize that they're rivals and kick him out. So, he goes to Sammo Hung who teaches him the necessities and he takes on a bunch of bad guys, no story really just enjoy the film.

And enjoy the film you will. I had no clue that this was one of the better pre-80's martial arts films, and I just bought it because it has Sammo Hung, with a picture of him on the cover from Pedicab Driver. Marketing. Anyways, everybody AND I MEAN EVERYBODY here does an awesome job, especially Sammo, the unknown guy, and, well, jeez everybody. Even this one guy who comes out of no where with 2 spears is awesome. Lots of wing chun elements as well as sucker moves, TONS of acrobatics, practically the quality of Knockabout really. This unknown, though, is amazing, and has the quality moves that Biao had in Knockabout, except for Biao's way high arial cartwheel with his fight alone against Ka Wing.

Like I said, lots of Wing Chun elements, all of them look really good and at the same time are original enough for me to think, "Hmm, never seen that done before," repeatedly. Then there are all of these fights with 2 on 1, one of them is in the beginning, one toward the end, and one at the end. All of them are good, and the camera work sometimes gets pretty dynamic and makes the fights look even better. Maybe I'm rambling so much because I knew ABSOLUTELY NOTHING about this movie except that Sammo was in it, but it turned out to be extremely entertaining and I only wish I had the VCD so I could avoid the terrible dubbing.

Even that guy with Yuen Shun I from Buddhist Fist (the fat nerdy guy) plays one of the masters and looks totally professional. I wanna know more about the actors in this movie, and also who made it. Back to back fight scenes, all the people are in their primes even if they're 50 years old or whatever, the bald guy from Knockabout is in it (and does an awesome job), Lam Ching Ying has a cameo, and of course Chung Fa and the guy I call The Hero One Eyebrow from Buddhist Fist, who take on the unknown a few times (so add 2 to the total 2 on 1 fights), look great, do acrobatics, and yea, wow. There must be over 15 fights total in this movie, really, and if not, think of it this way. There aren't 5 minutes of story that go by without either a training scene or a long LONG fight. Yea it's two beat, and it's not extremely fast or anything, but you know, that can be a good thing. Here, you can see EXACTLY what is happening, and that works in this case. So, anyone who says 2 beat fights are stupid regardless, tell them that they're stupid, regardless. You can tell what's happening. Joint locks, arm locks, hell the unknown ties up Hero One Eyebrow and Chung Fa with just their arms and legs. Wing Chun, Snake, Tiger, Crane, Spear, Long Fist, you name it, lots of wing chun, joint locks again, all over the place. You'll have a hard time naming them all.

Sammo, like I said, is amazing. There are a few times where I sit there and awe at the guy, still. Yea I KNOW he can do rolls and kick ups and everything like that, but actually seeing him do it is almost magical. This is where this movie accels when compared to Knockabout. Sammo really gets his time, against a guy with 2 spears (who is amazing, no doubt about it, and comes out of no where) and then against baldy from Knockabout, doing tons of acrobatics.

Ok I'll shut up now. But just see this movie to experience so many styles, styles that are called out and stuff you can recognize and the wing chun, again, is really cool looking. It's as though they mix it in with everything else in the movie. Ok enough.

10/10 - Damn I'm generous. Oh well. These movies rock I'm tellin ya.























UPDATE 10/9 - Rating System Change

5/5

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